well, since nobody put any jokes here yet, i figured i'd start a thread to get the ball rolling. or bouncing.
here's some jokes i got from the Philippines...
1) there was a man who lived in the province and his life dream was to live in Manila. when he finally got enough money to relocate his family, he decided on a self tour of the city. after roaming for a while, he had the urge to, er, poop. so he found a plastic bag and pooped in it like nobody's buiness (geddit? business? nevermind...) after that, he found some butchers but he thought that they were the garbage people so he gave them the bag. when the people, thinking the man was selling meat, wieghed it, they said "hmm... 3 kg..." when they looked inside the bag however, they said "huh?! poop?! what a rip off! get him!!!" the man ran home and bolted the door of his house, he said to his family "phew, living in Manila is tough! here, your poop must be at least 5 kg!!!"
2)An office manager at Wal-Mart was given thetask of hiring an individual to fill a job opening.
After sorting through a stack of resumes he found
four people who were equally qualified... An
American, a Russian, an Australian and a Filipino.
He decided to call the four in and ask them only one
question. Their answer would determine which of
them would get the job.
The day came and as the four sat around the
conference room table the interviewer asked, "What
is the fastest thing you know of?"
Acknowledging Dave, the American on his
right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT." It just pops
into your head. There's no warning that it's on the
way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest
thing I know of."
"That's very good!" replied the interviewer.
"And now you sir?" he asked Vladimir, the
Russian. "Hmm.... let me see. A blink! It comes
and goes and you don't know that it ever happened.
A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."
"Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an
eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed."
He then turned to George, the Australian who
was contemplating his reply. "Well, out at my dad's
ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall
there's a light switch. When you flip that switch,
way out across the pasture the light in the barn
comes on. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest
thing I can think of."
The interviewer was very impressed with the
third answer and thought he had found his man.
"It's hard to beat the speed of light" he said.
Turning to Eleuterio, the Filipino, the fourth and
final man, the interviewer posed the same question.
Eleuterio replied, "Apter herring da 3 frevyos
ansers sirrr, et's obyus to me dat the fastest thang
known is Diarrhea."
"WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the
response.
"O I can expleyn serrr." said Eleuterio. "
YOU SEE SERR, DA other day I wasn't Peeeling so good
and I run soo fast to the CR or bathroom, but before
I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, ay
'tang ina, I already had a big tae, ka-ka or poo-poo
in my pants.
Eleuterio is now the new "Greeter" at
Wal-Mart.
keep laughing people!
Subject: Jokes 
Sat Dec 01, 2007 11:25 am
nat. Btw thanks for starting this section. I didn't hav time to start it yet as I putting down rulez cuz some poeple wouldn't know what to do in this type of post even though the word JOKES/funny stuff only. YUp so thx anyway. heck your message, i sent u another one. 
